Monday, May 4, 2009

The MYTH of Customer Loyalty

I’m sure this has never happened to you ... not in your business.

But ... did you know there are customers who actually drift from one business to another?

Yes, believe it or not, some businesses have had customers or clients, who they’ve been dealing with for months or even years, just suddenly ... disappear!

*poof*

Where do they go?

They go to your competitor!

Sometimes, they drift away without thinking much about it ... sometimes it’s quite intentional, due to something you do that they think you shouldn’t ... or something they think you should do but you don’t.

Whatever the reason, the end result is ... they’re gone.

Which brings me to today’s BIG WARNING:

*** Never fall for “The Myth of Customer Loyalty”! ***

Anytime you start lamenting over the lack of “loyalty” among your customers, STOP ... and consider the following...

Most of us are familiar with that one particular radio station playing in every customer’s head ... all day, every day:

WII-FM ... “What’s In It For Me”.

They’ve been listening to that same station all their life. (And I’ll bet you have, too.)

Now you may win them over to YOUR station, initially, by playing THEIR favorites ... in other words, by giving them what they want.

But ... if your signal grows weak or drifts, they won’t stay tuned-in, listening to static. If you change your format, they won’t just automatically change their tastes.

People remain “loyal” to whoever best satisfies their needs and desires. That’s as far as “customer loyalty” extends.

The danger in thinking in terms of “customer loyalty” is the assumption (even if it’s “only” in your subconscious) that it’s something the CUSTOMER does.

THEY remain loyal.

Or they don’t.

Truth is ... you don’t ever want to leave something this important to your customer ... or to “chance”.

So how do you get around this problem?

I suggest you do so ... by eliminating the whole “customer loyalty” mindset, itself.

From now on, your concern is for “Customer RETENTION”!

You may think this is just a question of semantics ... of “playing with words”. But it’s more than that. It’s playing with your own mind.

This simple change in wording ... and in attitude ... places responsibility squarely in YOUR hands. Now your subconscious accepts that it is entirely up to YOU to “RETAIN” customers – not up to THEM to REMAIN loyal.

If you’ve ever felt that “customer loyalty” was a problem for you, you may notice a change in your business simply by adopting this new mindset. And doing so will allow your subconscious to think of many new approaches to achieving your goal.

Remember: it is far easier (and less expensive!) to retain a current customer ... than to acquire a new one!

*****************

This article is adapted from "Effective Marketing Methods", available here:
http://www.AlHendersonOnline.com

Monday, April 27, 2009

If You’re A Head-Shaver ... Or Still Considering It ... I Want To Hear From You

I stood at the bathroom sink, staring into the mirror, and wondering “Who is that?”

I had been looking in that mirror for … what, half an hour? An hour? I wasn’t sure.

During that time, I never really noticed the ‘person’ in the mirror … only the ‘process’, as clumps of hair, haphazardly clipped, dropped into the stainless bowl I had placed over the sink. (I knew this would be a big enough job, without having to free up a hair-clogged drain, afterward!)

This was followed by an attack with my electric razor’s sideburn trimmer … and finally, an ‘all-over shave’ with that same razor.

Only then did I really look at what was left. And I was shocked!

It looked like one of those rubber ‘skinheads’ you might find in a novelty shop – a really bad one.

And I began to think that maybe all that trepidation and fear that had held me back through the many months (years?) I’d been considering this … was actually my ‘better judgment’ speaking.

I’m sure most guys who try head-shaving go through this period of doubt – even remorse – once it’s all gone … certainly, at least, those of us who have watched our head growing out through the top of our hairdo for a number of years. We tend to place an unreasonably high value on every hair that remains up there.

And the thought of cutting and shaving the last of it away just seems like sacrilege.

But like I said … I’d been considering this for a very long time. I was tired of the “Reverse Mohawk” look – where you have hair everywhere BUT that strip up and over the top. So…

Consoling myself with the knowledge that it would only take a few months to grow back (IF it grew back *gulp*) … I took the plunge. And found myself, at around 11:00 p.m., leaning over the sink, scissors in hand, cutting away chunks of what little hair I had. Sober, even!

And now that it’s done, I have some questions for those of you who have been doing this for a while. (Not just for me - I figure others still in the "considering" stage might be interested in your views, too.)

First of all…

What’s your favorite tool and technique? I used an electric shaver, for that initial shave. But the two guys I’ve heard from since have both said they use a blade. Chris swears by the Gillette Mach 3 Turbo, which I’ve used on my face for quite a while … and Vin showed me this really wild unit called HeadBlade. (It looks like a little yellow car that you drive all over your skull – gotta get me one!)

I can’t help wondering whether anyone has tried one of those products like Neet or Nair. Supposedly, the hair grows back in soft, not stubbly. Or is that stuff too caustic to use on your head? (Hey, I’m just asking…)

Do you use shampoo or facial cleanser? Hey, I’m serious! I eye those shampoo bottles in the tub, and wonder whether to dump ’em or donate ’em. (Oh, and I just remembered what a workmate said, many years ago: “You don’t spend much on shampoo, Al … but it must cost you a fortune in face soap”.)

Do you have any head-shaving stories you can share? I’m sure there are lots of funny or embarrassing (bound to be some overlap between the two) stories out there – whether they help newbies like me avoid certain things you’ve found don’t work … or just help us get through this awkward beginner phase by laughing at a common experience.

Now, being a rank newbie to head-shaving, there’s not much advice I can give. But I will say this…

If you’re planning to shave your head, may I suggest you do it when your face and neck are not already tanned? I live in central British Columbia, so I timed it between the cold weather and tanning season. An alternative to waiting might be to first get a really short “brush cut” so some sun, at least, can get through to your scalp for a bit before you shave it all off.

Part of the initial shock of shaving your head is, obviously, the look. But be prepared for the new feel, too. That might have been less shocking if I had used a blade, for a closer shave.

Granted, my electric shaver is not the best … and I really didn’t want to keep going back-and-forth over my sensitive pate, the first time shaving it. (I know what that can do to my face, if I’ve had a beard for a while.) Still … I didn’t like the way it left me with ‘the stubblies’. The back of my head felt like a pig’s rump! (Okay, yes – I’m only guessing what that would feel like.)

And as strange as I looked (to myself, at least – no one else had seen me at this point) … it was nothing compared to the sensation of my head on my pillow. I don’t know whether the flannel pillowcase made any difference. But the moment the back of my head hit that pillow, it just seemed to stick (the stubble again, maybe?) … and the feeling was one of leather on leather. Yuk!

I’ll give this a few days, or a week, then update you on how things are going, and how well I’m adjusting … or not.

In the meantime, whether you’re already shaving or just considering it … if you have any advice or questions, let me know.

Simply leave a comment below. Thanks!

Friday, April 10, 2009

Winston Churchill Catches An Untimely Cold

Imagine if, on the occasion of a particularly famous ‘talk’ he gave, Winston Churchill had suffered from a nasty head cold. That oft-quoted line might then have been...

“Debbuh ... debbuh ... debbuh ... DEBBUH gib ub!”

THIS sorta thing comes out of my mind quite regularly!

I often have these brief "scenes" (for want of a better term) pop into my head - complete with setting, dialogue ... everything. And I often jot them down ... then promptly forget about them. Like this one:

*****

I knew, as soon as I came to, that something was terribly wrong.

I still had all my senses. I could see the people in the room, all dressed in surgical scrubs. I could hear them talking among themselves. I could smell all the usual O.R. smells. I could feel the hard cot beneath me and the mechanically cool air all around me.

And I could taste my fear. For all of my recognition that a conversation was going on, I could not make out a single word of it. All was gibberish to me.

And the adrenalin ran on.

I tried to sit up, to look around. Some masked man put his hand to my shoulder and firmly, easily, pushed me back onto my pillow. He spoke from behind his mask – seemingly, to me. More gibberish.

His sweeping finger indicated a path across my forehead, from temple to temple. I reached up weakly to where he had indicated … and felt a row of stitches.

Panic took me … then all went black.

*****

So no point to that, really - just another of those things that might make you say, "Hmmm..."

... or not.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Going through my old journal today, I came across this entry - sort of the antithesis of environmentalism, from an unexpected source. Read on...

Saturday, 18 November, 2000 - Today, on the TV show 'Going Fishing, with Darryl Cronzy', this fellow from Pasha Lake, Ontario, landed a Blue Pickerel (bluish on fins, rather than the usual yellowish hue). Here's the unbelievable bit of conversation that ensued:

Host: "Well, they're not common, are they?"

Guide: "No. In fact, they're supposed to be almost extinct. But ... here they are!"

Host: "Are they good-eating?"

Guide: "Oh - beautiful!"

Host: "Y'wanna throw that in the cooler?"

Guide: "Yeah, sure."

So tell me ... does that strike YOU as just a little irresponsible ... especially coming from a TV fishing show, in this day & age? What do you think?

Monday, March 30, 2009

Ode To A Cashier

[Note from Al: I recommend you read the "preamble" below (in the previous post) ... either before or after reading the poem.]

I think I blew it.
I’m sure I did.
A bad impression, I’ll bet,
Is what I gave you
When I did phone.
(Now, I doubt a date I’ll get.)

I meant to say
I wanted to
Get together and chat sometime.
To get to know
Yourself, I’m sure,
Would be a pleasure sublime.

Instead, my words
Came out all wrong
And said not what I wanted them to.
So now I’ll try
To make them right.
(Now, if only the right words I knew!)

For two months now
Or thereabouts,
I’ve been doing my shopping each day.
I purchase milk
Or eggs or bread,
Then say, “Bye!” and I’m on my way.

Then, on the trip
Back home again,
I kick myself in the butt.
“You twit!” I say.
“You missed your chance.
What are you – some kind of nut?”

It’s just that I’m
Not often sure
What the best thing to say might be.
And, as it works out,
The best thing to say
Is rarely the thing said by me.

I’m getting off track –
I wanted to say
That I find you so very attractive.
(Darn, now I can’t think
Of a word to rhyme –
Guess my mind’s not sufficiently active!)

At any rate,
The point is this –
If we got to know each other,
You never know –
You might decide
That you want me to meet your Mother.

I’m getting ahead
Excuse me, please.
There’s no need to rush this, at all.
But, if you would like
To meet for a java,
Please feel free – anytime – to call.

I really will try
To make all my words
Come out in a logical way
And try not to let
Your beauty upset
The things I endeavor to say.

My name’s in the book –
My number, too.
I’ll wait at the end of the line.
And, if you decide
You’d like dinner instead,
That’s okay – I cook pretty fine!

Whatever your choice,
Please bear in mind
(And I really can’t stress this, enough)
I’m sure that you
Will like me, too,
Once you’ve heard all the lovable stuff.

- copyright Al Henderson
written Summer of 1986 or ‘87
- title added years later

Epilogue

So the hopeless (ie: pathetic) romantics are probably wondering how long the ensuing relationship lasted.

The more realistic folks might assume better.

I never heard from her.

Nor did I ever see her again!

I was so devasted and embarassed by the whole thing ... I switched to another store, altogether.

Fast forward a couple years.

I was training a small group of women for a regional bodybuilding competition. Turned out one of the gals was the older sister of that cashier.

"Really?" I asked. "So ... does she still have that poem?"

"No..." was the reply. "But my Mom does.
SHE just LOVES it!"

Go figger.


Ode To A Cashier:

A brief explanatory preamble...

You might call this one of my earliest attempts at writing "sales copy" ... 'cause I was trying to "sell" this girl on ME.

This is, of course, presented here just for fun. Hopefully, it'll bring a smile to your lips ... if not a chuckle to your belly.

So ... the true, embarassing, and painful (at the time, anyhow) story behind this poem:

I wrote this around 1986 0r '87. I was in my late 20s, and living in a small saw- and pulp-mill town in north-central British Columbia, Canada.

And there was this one EXCEPTIONALLY cute gal working as a cashier in the grocery store I frequented. But...

I was TOTALLY subdued around her. I just couldn't talk. Oh, sure ... I could talk about my groceries ... the weather ... almost anything but the idea of "getting together socially". (No, I would NEVER have used those actual words!)

Every time I made up my mind to try, I would chicken-out the moment I got up to her till. One day, though...

One day, I decided "THIS is the day!" I was going to FORCE myself out of my shyness and ask her out! (Yes, I realise the grocery store checkout line is a dumb place to ask for a date ... but I never SAW her anywhere else.)

I stepped up with my groceries (which I didn't need and only picked up as a reason to go through her line), tried to force myself into a state of bravery, and ... was reduced to near-babbling.

OH! I felt like such a fool. If I'd had a tail, it would've been firmly lodged between my legs as I paid and left. The whole walk home was "grey and blue". (Mutter, mutter ... curse, curse ... fume, fume.)

When I got home, I tried again. I actually PHONED her at work ... and was once again reduced to a babbling IDIOT!

So, running on "auto-pilot", I grabbed a pen and paper, and wrote the poem on the next page. I say "I wrote" ... but it was truly a case of "automatic writing". Upon finishing, I had NO idea what I had just scribed, until I read it back.

I rewrote it neatly ... folded it neatly ... put it neatly into an envelope ... neatly wrote her name on the envelope ... drove back to the store (neatly) ... put it in her hand and left. (Even before reading it, she likely thought, "WIERD guy". )

Okay, then ... if you're ready, here's the poem, in the next post. (followed by an Epilogue)

Sunday, February 1, 2009

A more BORING layout ... but at least it's LEGIBLE!

There we go ... layout template changed.

I liked the cookie monster idea ... but had no idea, when I chose it, that it would white text on a dark blue background.

Again ... my apologies.

We'll just run with THIS, for now.

Ciao, mein!

WHOA!

Okay this is a GROSS template I'm using here. Ya can hardly READ this.

My HUMBLEST apologies.

I will change this soon.

(Yech! This really IS harsh.)

If roadies ran the world... (Nextel Super Bowl ad)

Okay ... I wasn't going to start this blog, yet. But I decided to just jump right in so I could post this idea:

Did you watch the Super Bowl?

Yeah, well ... I didn't. BUT...

I watched the commercials (arguably the best PART of Super Bowl Sunday) here:
http://ca.youtube.com/superbowl
You can even RATE each one, with a thumbs-up or thumbs-down vote. COOL!

Anyhow...

When that Nextel ad ("If roadies ran the world") started, I was REALLY hoping it was a new movie trailer!

Would YOU watch ... "RoadieAir"?

I would!

Let's hope someone picks up on it and FILMS that sucker!

(And if they do, I want $$$ for the idea ... or for the title ... or even just tickets and popcorn for the premiere?)

I'm outta here...